GOOD ENOUGH PARENTING

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  Setting Reasonable Limits Promotes Self Discipline  
 
 

Proverbs 25:28
Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control.

Self Control builds you up not only that even a city will get destroyed.

1 Corinthians 9:24-27
24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.
25 Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.
26 Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air.
27 No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.


The key differentiator between success and failure in sports or school or life is Exercising Self Control over all things.

2 Timothy 1:7
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

Spirit of Self Control is a gift God gives us to live a victorious life and not to give into fear.

Titus 2:12
It teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age,

We are called to get trained to live a life of self control when we seek to live a godly life. When this need of reasonable limit is met children are able to be self controlled and self disciplined at least to an extent.

Though it doesn't come naturally for most children, they will eventually be able to be grateful for the ability to limit themselves. They will have thoughts like, "It is good to enjoy life but it is often necessary to do the hard things first and to deny myself when I feel like giving into potentially harmful emotions or desires. It is fair for me to get my way in relationships some of the time but not necessarily all of the time. I feel a sense of satisfaction when I achieve goals I have set for myself".

Children with this kind of thinking and inner motivation and discipline will be ahead of others in life - learning to delay gratification at an early age has proven to be a indicator of future success.

A persuasive study found that children with self discipline were not only to have developed addiction or committed a crime by adulthood, but were also healthier and wealthier than their more impulsive peers.

Many parents push their children to learn more and cram more classes to have high IQ. More than IQ it is Self discipline that has a bigger effect on academic performance. However as parents whom do we blame when their children underachieve? We blame the schools and teachers and tuitions and large size class.

While these are important factors perhaps we parents need to look closer to home. As parents we have failed to teach our kids to make choices that help them to sacrifice short term pleasure for long term gains and to pay attention to rules and remember instructions.

It is doubtful any kid is born with these traits. Hopefully parents can model and teach about the value of doing the hard things first, of dealing with anger in a healthy way, of managing time and money well, of treating their body with respect and of keeping their word. If as parents we can manage all that, we would have given our kids a huge gift.

Today's Practical

Give one choclate to your children and tell them they are free to eat. But let them know they will get one more if they keep it without eating for 2 hours.

Bring up to your child the areas in their life you feel they are impulsive and dive into immediate gratification.

Explain to them the benefits of long term gain in those areas if they learn to sacrifice short term kick.